Have you seen hal jordans hair recently ?

sweet lord 

Look I know nobody cares about green lantern any more but for us madmen incapable of dropping the book its been one hell of a ruff ride. Which is a shame cause it started ok. Ish . For me anyway . Like it was always going to be difficult coming off of big goffs jons run but damn son. Shits been grim. The writers basically set about destroying everything fun about about gl. starting with the base concept of silly syfy space cops cutting about with power bling. There was a whole arc about how using power rings was draining the light reservoir. Because silly fun has to have a cost? Its one of my most hated tropes in fiction . Limiting the use of your gimmicks to seem more mature. Like when warp speed was tarring holes in the universe back in the next gen. Did anything ever come of that ? I hope not. A trip to memory alpha may be needed.

Also all the blue lanterns died . Yes . Even that elephant guy. Cry.

I feel the rest of the cores are down too buy I honestly couldn't recall from memory what there up to. I think the red lanterns became all about moustaches for a bit.

Oh yeah and every green lantern but hal is dead. Even mogo . Again . Hal seemingly killed kiolowog accidentally himself.

Sigh. Well comics are comics and everything will be fine eventually. Everything always snaps back to the status quo or there about's eventually. That said green lantern is the poster boy book for my theory of DCs stratagem of letting everything go to shit after a big writers run. Cause its always going to be a tuff act to follow right ? So why not lean into that. Just ruin everything that made fans love that property before bringing in a new team and righting the ship. I feel bad about saying that. There has been parts of the current run that Iv quite liked. Its just soo ruff to see gl in this state. Under goff it somehow became the red ranger franchise of DC . For a bit . Shaping events like blackest night. Crazy days indeed. The constant death and rebirth of the green lantern corps is a definite thing . Lurching between universe ending events was what it was all about for sure. Its probably a symptom of my compressed memory but to see it dead AGAIN feels too soon. Like it never felt like the corps had time to breath and be space cops. And not a space army. Witch is the dumbest and most angering thing. Stop referring to the gls as an army in your not at all down with the yoof DC YOU marketing DC . Is dumb.

Anyway. Hal jordan is not captain kirk currently. He's a off brand star lord cutting about in a trench coat in a space ship with a passive aggressive A.I not even slinging the ring but instead packing a power glove. Its something new and different at least ? Kinda ? Its super neo 90s anti hero comic in design. Its kinda scary that creators are taking stuff from 90s comics in a serious way . Though I guess its only fair since all of that silver age plundering. Maybe we'll get guy gardener producing guns from his flesh at some point again . Dreams.

Anyway. Have you seen hal jordans hair recently ? Sure it was anti hero long. A little wintery soulgury if you as me. But last issue it went full hair metal ! Id be impressed if I wasn't soo sicked by how far gl has fallen. This issue it went totely out of control ! Its like that kind of weird not actually a mullet but its definitely the kind of hair cut that would hang out with mullets. Our would at least by a mullet a drink if it saw one down and out in a bar somewhere. Its far from the worst thing to come out of this green lantern run we haven't even talked about that whole stretch of time when hal was actively space hitler but I feel its emblematic of the problem of where the books at and how DC feels about it.

floooooowing !

Be better green lantern. Please ? For the old days ?

pick o the week 24.9.12

Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads Lads right ... lads sit doon lads. Sit doon. Something amazing happened. Like beautifully surprisingly amazing. Green lantern new guardians wasny pish this month.

 

Ayes this is happening. I can feel it even now. The worlds a better place for it all ready. The suns blazing and aww the doom and gloom has collapsed in on itself like some sort of doom and gloom based cake that's capable of collapsing in on its self. I'm not a bakery scientist so I'm not sure of the logistics there. Shame that's all contradicted by the fact its autumn and the weathers decided to be utter shite not five minutes after that lad summer has been laid to rest in his jewel encrusted coffin.

Point is new guardians wasny shite. And I diny ken about you. But that's mind blowing. There I was rocking threw last weeks comics and BAM. New guardians knocks it out the fuckin park. The book grabbed me by my non existent collar an was aww HEER MATE ! SEE THIS SHITE ! ITS WELL WRITTEN ! SO SIT THE SHITE DOON ! AND READ IT ! New guardians speaks with an aggressive Scottish accent in my head now. It probably sits and reads the papers in a pub some ware. Its turned into that sort of guy.

 

Things happened in that issue man. The actual honest to god things. Cool things. Things WORTH talking aboot. That's something magical. Many things are capable of bringing a tear to my ruggedly manly eye socket and the quality of this issue was one of them. The bits that made it my pick o the week were the numerous moments of awesome like kyle rayner being able to channel the power of the other lantern cores to smoosh black lantern zombie mooks but also the wee touches like kyle referring to Hal jordain as “colonel jordan” and carol ferris's new less skanky costume.

 

Aye so basically its was a damn fine issue from a book iv come to not expect all that much from. I really REALLY hope new guardians keeps this going. Since issue one hit iv always hoped it live up to its potential as the ranger team lantern book. Hopefully this change in its levels of awesomeness its the book wakening up to what it can be. Power rangers. IN SPACE. But EVEN MORE SPACEY!

comic book quickies 8/12/11

Hey there internet pals looks like we're back to week one again and that's cool week ones a gid solid week though it dose feel like it took longer to get back here than it did the last three times most likely because of that pesky fifth week last month though looking on the bright side I don't mention filler or even buddy cops this week I know that cuz I'm writing this first wee bit last, spooky I know but it makes sense don't it ? This way iv gathered all my feelings and thoughts so that way I can tell you about them up front and how cool is that !

ACTION COMICS #4

written by Grant Morrison art by Rags Morales back up written by sholly fisch art by brad walker

Superman fights brainiacs beano robot mooks then has a boss battle with Lois lanes not boy friend who's been turned into the boss mook that I thought was the rebootaverse's version of the super hero steal but steal turns up later to pull off a big dam heroes moment so I guess the other dudes just some random dude. see I think I get this book now, its very silver age-ish. Now I know that's a no brainer what with grant Morrison and all but its oddly silver age-ish like a kind of mixture of things but again Morrison..... not sure how to put my feelings about the book so far into words. This issue was a step back up after the dip in quality after issues two and three as there's plenty of action here all right including one hell of a robot/tank combination megas xlr style! The arts back to being gid again what with it being the A artist and instead of making of gumf at the back this time we get a back up story to justify its price point ware steal fights not steal. I'm kind of enjoying the ride so far but its been a bit ruff in places.

RED LANTERNS #4

written by Peter Milligan art Ed Benes

Atrocitus begins to suspect that giving bleez her free will back and accidentally making her his own personal starscream might have been a bad idea plus we get the back stories of three red lantern mooks. Nothing really important has happened yet and its not been an overly fun read so far like I said last time its kinda grim maybe less grim this issue but its all very serious and not all that rage filled yeah the red lanterns are angry all right but not to berserker levels and I know that's most likely a decision made so they can tell story's with the characters without every issue being bllllaaaaahhh were so angry but like I said nothing all that interesting has happened yet and it feels like the plots just a little stretched which is a little sad as I think most of us really want a red lantern book though I don't think any of us would know what would actually happen it but we still want one. Red lanterns are cool after all.

DETECTIVE COMICS #4

written and by Tony S. Daniel

Batman fights joker imposters controlled by a new grimdark 80s meat and flesh styled villain called the doll maker to save commissioner Gordon and a little kid who turns out is a bad guy. SHOCK. This was all right not that grate but not so bad either. Its still suffering from being outclassed in pretty much every way by the batman monthly and the fact that the joker hasent been seen since issue one dosent help much either instead we get the dollmaker and I'm really not digging him mainly cause he's that grim dark type of villain who's main shtick is harvesting organs and cutting dudes faces off and that's really not my cop of tea. To be fair on the book though I think it is fulfilling its purpose of giving the rebootaverse its grimdark hard-boiled batman book quite nicely and since the same guys drawing it as well as writing it the art machies the tone of the book perfectly.

JUSTICE LEAGUE INTERNATIONAL #4

written by Dan Jurgens art Alberto Aaron Lopresti

The justice league international fight mole people underneath giant tribal robots and then come face to face with there first big bad, a jack Kirby style space miner resplendent in tron lines. A damn fine comic and damn fine team book. The JLI really feel like a team now and well they have felt like more of a team than the actual justice league since issue one. Doovay davey keeps saying to me that this books just like a proper 80s comic and hell yes it is. Its just so god damn colourful and the batters just so gid and the team is less serious business and just plain more fun than most teams out there. It defiantly gets a glowing recommendation from me.

comic book quickies 25/8/11

Now that the Flashpoint filler fest is over with we can charge forward into a new era of comics! DC is rebooting its universe with 52 new titles. the rebootverse is here! A month full of new number ones!

JUSTICE LEAGUE #1

Written by Geoff Johns art by Jim Lee

So this is the first book of the new universe, the jumping on point for new readers and most likely the highest selling book of the year. As a comic on its own it was pretty gid but to me personally I didn't think it was a good start for the new universe. A team was not put together. I know it probably wouldn't have worked having all the league in issue one but it doesn't feel right, all we got was Batman and Hal Jordan being buddy cops chasing an alien and getting shot at by cops. Not the epic start I was hoping for but as I said as just a comic it was fine with some cool moments between the two heroes. Really its main problem is that it's being so clearly written for the trade making it an ungodly slow start.

ACTION COMICS #1

Written by Grant Morrison art by Rags Morales

Rebootaverse superman is kick ass. This is pretty much everything you could want for a #1 featuring superman. He keeps doing superman-y things! He bends guns, jumps tall buildings and gets hit in the face by trains. Ah, just like the old days. At the same time though he is quite un-superman-y and kind of Batman-ish, throwing wife beaters out windows and neo Nazis into sewage works. He's not proper Supes yet, he's young and incredibly arrogant but its only issue one and he'll get that kicked out of him eventually. But dudes its MORRISON writing superman it'll be fine.

DETECTIVE COMICS #1

Written by Tony S. Daniel art by Ryan Winn

So yeah in the lead up to the New 52 I heard nothing but bad things about this book that it was going to suck cos of the writer and that Batman #1 was where it was at. But I got it any being that it is Detective Comics #1 so it surprised me that it was a lot of fun. It's Batman's first run in with the Joker and it's handled pretty well, the Jokers still a sick bastard and surprisingly for me the Batman of this book is pretty balanced and by that I mean he's not grim dark he's focused on getting the joker but to too focused to forget about collateral damage and I'm not sure where this falls in the time line but he must be young as the Joker actually lands some hits on him. Yeah, he'd been hit by joker gas but he's still Batman. And yeah, something pretty mental happens at the end that makes me want to read more. Pretty good for a book that labelled filler in my head before I read it.

STATIC SHOCK #1

Written by Scott McDaniel art by John Rozum

This was just fine, nothing mind blowing but a good introduction to a young hero. One weird thing is Static is operating out of New York which is just odd to me I dont think of the America of DC having a New York, Metropolis and Gotham kind take over from it. So yeah nothing bad to say for this comic.

JUSTICE LEAGUE INTERNATIONAL #1

Written by Dan Jurgens art by Aaron Lopresti

See this is weird man, the JLI is all together before the proper JL is. Well this is set after the JL forms in comic book time but in real world time the jokey JLI seems more like a real team than the all star universe launchers back at the top of this page. The United Nations put a team of heroes together and make Booster Gold the leader. Hilarity ensues.

And finally an in depth look into the event comic that brought us this new era. FLASHPOINT: a retrospective:

THOMAS WAYNE. Nuff' said.