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Sunday, 28 April 2013

Comic book quickies double feature ! Again !




JUSTICE LEAGUE #19

written by geoff johns art by ivan reis

Big batman likes. What a guy. The goff man's running with modern internet teachings that the bats has a plan to take down everyone one. Even members of his team. Which is cracking. Because of course he dose. He is batman after all. Omnigod of creation ! The niffty wee plot of the issue is what if some one stole them plans. Which sadly is a little shite. Seeing as some guy just broke into the batcave. It cheapens the cave I think. Ayes maybe the league and that know about it but that's enough likes. For some guy to rock up to it and take down Jason todd AND Alfred is a little shite. Like the joker couldn't get in but some punk ass JL villain could ? I'm no having that. Though having said that my gut tells me the intruder is bats himself. Because sometimes he's a cunt like that. Aww wells. We'll see likes. Wonder woman thaw. She's quite horrible. Like her and superman just jump into a country and free some hostages putting the justice league in some political hot water. Which really I was fine with. Lest they were saving lives and that. But she genuinely thinks she's a god god. And by that I mean yes she might be an actual god or dimi god or what ever she actually is but she THINKS she's all powerful. That because metas are strong they should rule the earth and do what ever the fuck they want. Its like she forgets that villains exist. Ands that when one pops up she normally gets the shit kicked out of her. And that yes. She could probably take A green lantern. But probably not two. And definitely not the whole human lantern ranger team. To be fair. Superman's a lad about it. Telling her to calm doon. She totes flys off the handle at bats though. Huge mistake there.



SUPERGIRL #19

written by mike johnson art by mahmud asrar

Gotta love it when a solid comics keeps being solid. Once again. Supergirl fights a fool. Basically. Job done guys. Lets all go to the lobby and get ourselves some well earned snacks. Its all good. Life that is. Being alive and reading supergir. You have to admit there's quite a vibe to that. Its that sunny dc continuity vibe. Ayes you could just be reading superman. Fair play. But you were aww like. Naws. Lets give big supergirl a try. Good on you's likes. Its a damn well nifty made comic. Now yes its not going to set the world on fire. But it really dosent need to. Its just a solid wee book ware supergirl fights a fool. This issue we get double the bang for our buck. Two supegirls ! Well supergirl and power girl. Heela cools like. Iv not read much with power girl in it but I do here good things about the character. Also if its going to be a whole buddy cop adventure I'm totes up for that. As you know I'm slightly partial to that whole sub genre there. Its kind basically my soul. We also get some shameless costume damage forcing a costume change this issue for powergirl. That's indeed something all right.



AMETHYST #7

written by christy marx art by marc andreyko

Amethyst number seven should be subtitled the return of the swagger. Because yes sonny jims. The swagger has indeed retuned. It did wobble a bit last issue. Eclipso really felt a bit shit. He sort of gets a better chance to shine here. Cutting about the fantasy world being more fantasy if you get me. Like he's using magic and that. They do a good job of integrating him to the world. Hells, having said that I dinny ken a thing about the first amethyst from back in the day. Maybe eclipso was always a thing. Hmm. Utter shames on me. Apart from that there is still a lot of plot happening. Like if your looking for a comic ware things happen. This is the book for you. Because things indeed happen. Like folk die son. They just die. Important folk. Folk with big things happening. Its interesting. I didn't think they'd kill off the movers and shakers this early. But as we've already established I don't understand the world any more. Its fine. Amethyst is still a damn fine comic well worth reading. Like you there. Eric ! You ! Should read this book !

 

GREEN LANTERN NEW GAURDIANS #19

written by tony bedard art by andres guinaldo

Kyle and the team get there shit together after being mind raped by the first lantern. I really cant get over how amazingly none of the team were taking the first lanterns shite. It really was gurren lagann ish. Perhaps even laddish of them. Damn laddish of the writer to be sure. Now this issue didn't quite live up to the last two. It was if I'm being honest a little bit like filler. You what son. That ok with me. This was filler used to surprisingly good effect. Remember that last issue of actual green lantern ware sinestros home planet got utterly wrecked ? And it felt surprisingly hollow ? Well we get some follow up on that here. We get to see the aftermath and sinestros rage at it. Which is neat. We also get a nice bit of kyle trying to use the white ring to bring back the planet. Which if you ask me is way cool. Kyle IS white lantern after all. He kinda is a wee god right now. It dosent go well yes but at least he gave it a go. So far I am likening this event. Its a lot more fun than the last one, though that may not be all that a hard thing to be. I'm not missing the mad guardians. Yet.


AGE OF ULTRON BOOK SIX

written by brian michael bendis and drawn by folk. Its confusing.

I'm starting to feel it. No. not the actual event. The HATE for the actual event. Its beginning to snake its way threw my body. It feels good. Hate is always wonderful. So like I said before. I couldn't really bring myself to actually hate. Age of ultron. Its a dark dystopian future and all the bleak negative tropes that come with it I cant really complain about. Its just what thee going for. Things get really stupid though. And that too would be fine. Thing is this is the issue ware things start to effect the marvel universe. Kinda. We'll see ware it all gos in the end. But for now. Spoilers I should say. Wolverine has went back in time and killed hank pym. See that son . See aww that. FUCK THAT. That's just about the worst thing iv ever read. If I didn't know better I would have thought it was written by mark fucking miller. Its sick. Its the most modern cut writer of a thing to do. The hell happened to you bendis ? And how did you get over it so amazingly ? Sigh. I just don't know what any thing's about any more. Well. At lest I still ken sue storms a massive bastard. I go as far to say she's the worst human to ever live. Because shes there. She could have easily stopped wolverine. But she didn't. Because I duuno. She just wants humanity to suffer. Its totes her thing these days. Maybe. Just maybe Ill one day eat tho's words. Its difficult to tell ware every thing's heading. This event has been massively pish so far but it might end strongly. And even then It might be a know event seeing as there's another marvel event just wrong the corner. Ahh wells. Always remember what sue storm did here today. Or rather. What she didn't do. And forever hold it against her.

 

IRON MAN #8

written by kieron gillen art by greg land

Offft yes. Have I ever mentioned how I bloody love gillens iron man ? Because DAMN SON its just utterly cracking. It has virtually everything a I want from a good comic. Action AND banter and of course. The most important element. SPACE. Fun space that is. With aliens and robots. And big ass laser beams. God damn love space. Has to be said. Also gladiatorial combat. That's in the mix here too. Big tony stark is fairly good at the auld gladiatorial combat. Ayes it probs happened to him a thousand times before. But I like to think its thanks to those combat lessons from the living legends big captain America. There's plot to be had here as well. The transforming drinks dispenser pulls off a dramatic double cross bringing the mad celestials crashing down on house. Fantastic. I genuinely thought they were dead. Didn't they die at the end of hickmans ff run ? Doom was all up in there grill and I seem to remember something about galatus and his CRAZY wrestling skills. Aw wells. Those mad god lads are always a lot of fun. We don't actually get a fight between them and shell head. But that's fine likes. Them just being there was enough for me. So ayes. You should really give this run ago. So don't be put of by land. His art really works well here. Yes. No fooling.


THE SUPERIOR SPIDER-MAN #8

written by dan slott art by humberto ramos

ohhh mahhh hgawd. SHIT JUST GOT REAL FOLKS ock is fully aware of yami peter. I expect card game based buddy copping within the month. Its goona rock.. yes it is. Search your feeing internet person. You know it to be true. Are people REALLY still down in superior out there ? Whits rang with you. Its grate stuff. Ayes. Its different. And sometimes a little weird. And ock has gained a touch of the grim dark for some unknown reason. But its fun likes ! And its still as well written as the rest of slots run. This issue was a lot nifftyer than last. Well I thought so at least. Don't know what it was last time. I just wasn't feeling the vibe for some reason. Shame on me. This time though. I was feeling it. It was a lot more continuity er. There was some call backs to tocks plan too cook the world from ends of the earth. Which is nice. Seeing ock confront the fact that ock was all for whipping out humanity in what mas be a few weeks to months ago in in universe time . Ayes they do say it was last year. But hey. That still not all that long ago to be a genocidal mad man. Its all fun's likes. Now some might say that I jumped at the the spoiler reveal a little too early there in the review. And they'd be right. But come on now Ted. We all sort of knew that things would one day work themselves out. And now here we are. Hopefully it will go well for auld yami peter. As iv said many a time before. He's quite the lad.

 
so this JUST became a double feature folks !


MASKS #6

wtitten by chris roberson art by dennis calero

I like zoro. What a lad he is. Just cutting about pulp hero times. Ha ! Cutting about. Sometimes I just crack myself up. This was a fairly ok issue I have to say. Now it didn't knock my socks off or anything. But that's ok. It was fine. Kind of more of a transitional issue. Getting everyone where they need to be. Now if it was my decision I wouldn't have any of that. But fair play. I get why it needs to exist. So like I was saying. Its a neat issue. All told. Lots of nifty wee character moments and interactions. And we get a quick peak at what seems to be the big bad. No complaints really. Every things moving along nicely. Sadly that really dosent give me much to talk about. So ayes. It gets my coveted seal of approval ! Damn quick quickie there.


JUPITER'S LEGACY # 1

written by mark millar art by frank quitely

this was shite. I gave it ago and it was shite. Lets just move on.



BATMAN INC #10

written by grant morrison art by chris burnham

TAKE FLIGHT BAT GOD. Guys. Its happening. The batgods going to war. And I really have to say. Big bats isn't pishing aboot. Like its agaist everything he stands for but wouldn't be surprised if he just dosent kill the fuck out of talia. Like at this point she pretty much deserves it. So batman inc has kinda fallen. Like bruce has disbanded it but dick is carrying it on in secret. Cools. Bruce kind of gets edgy sometimes. I don't want to say he makes bad decisions during times like theses. Because he omnipotent. Being a god and all. Its just you know. Writing and all that jazz. For some reason he man bats up. Which is cool. I'm not really sure why. Dose he need that extra powah ? I just assumed he'd rock up to Wayne tower. Clear it out floor by floor like the beast he is. As man batman he IS piloting a suit of power armour. Now guys. Logic can fuck right off. Because that is awesome. The image of him screaming towards Wayne tower is hella striking. The bat god unleashed indeed. So yeah. Damn fine issue. We're getting to the end of big morrisons run as well. Not sure how to feel . It wont be the same anyway when he's done and gone. That's for sure.


FF #6

written by matt fraction art by joe quinones

READ FF. I'm telling you folks. You should be going out there to your friendly neighbourhood comic shop and buying FF. Why ? For the god damn AMAZING breakfast vibe. Yes. That right. We git a bit where the team just sit about and have breakfast. Yes. I shit you not. Its the most perfect thing iv ever read. The vibe was off the bloody charts. Best two pages of a comic ever you ask ? Hmm. Yes. Yes. A thousand times yes. In recent years thanks to rebuild of evangleion 2.0. iv come to think of launch as the beast meal of the day. Thanks to this comic I may have to re think that. You know. Some comic do have the power to change how you think. They can reach deep into your brain and change you. FF is definitely one of those books. Its doing very important vibe based work. Oh ayes. There was plot that happened. It was all quite nicely done. Medusa has gone mad ted and abducted bently or some pish and the yancy street gang canny be deaing with ms thing. Its just all that really just gets over shadowed by the breakfast. Like just thinking about it right now. Im not sure how I can go on with my life. I just want to keep relieving those two pages. Those two perfect pages.

 

FANTASTIC FOUR #7

written by matt fraction art by mark bagley

So how much of a colossal bastard is reed Richards like. The answer is utterly. Reed Richards is an utterly colossal bastard. Yes. We already knew that. It seems everything he dose is will dick off someone at some point down the line. Thing is. That's what this entire issue was about. No joke. Maybe I'm missing something but the plot this month seemed to be to make the team as un-likeable as possible. Ayes the things natural lad field protected him from the worst effects but god damn son. The team are transported to the end of the universe by god franklin and then are taken in and help by some nice aliens who've decided to stay and watch the end of time. Fair play to them. There the same dudes that sent blastaar to the big bang last issue. And for some reason. Some MAD reason. Reed takes this as an insult. Ayes the aliens plan isny aww that amazing but reeds aww. That's dumb ! I'm the smartest there is ! U should do my plan ! The aliens are aww naw thanks son its fine. Reed like go's off in a huff and steals the big bad monster. Saying you cant just drop your problems in the past. AND THEM EMEDIATLY DUMPS BLASTAAR IN THE NEGITIVE ZONE. The actual fuck is reed on ? What im I missing here. EVERYONE bar the thing was soo god damn un-likeble. Goosh ! I just don't get it !



UNCANNY AVENGERS #7

written by rick remender art daniel acuna

Yes. I have to say comic. I'm totally feeling the vibe. Its absolutely rocking ! Uncanny avengers isn't the easiest sale. That is to other folk. Most of it is utterly cracking. To me at least. There some wee niggles here and there. Like cap no being the red ranger or the mutants just being bastards because well there mutants and apparently the x gene means your physically incapable of ladness. The whole publicity team angle is a slight bummer too. EVERYTHING ell's though. Its off the gosh darn charts. Plot wise it kinda sort of looks like the mad celestials are going too war with earth. Once I again I genuinely assumed they were dead. Really should check up on that. Well one of them did “die” this issue. Dropped by some apocalypse punk. Cheap ayes. devaluing the whole space god thing. Definitely. Mr sinister did pilot that one celestial like a mech though. So really. Its not something to worry about. S.w.o.r.d. How amazingly shite are they likes. It seams every time they pop up in a book something they own explodes. You'd think some would get on that. Yes. So. Buy this book. Its pretty damn rad.


THE FLASH # 19

written by brian buccellato art by marcio takara

Oooofft. Hold on to your hats sports fans. This was a comic and a half. Let me tell you about big Barry Allan. Humanity's god king was without his powers this issue. The folk over at dial h stole them. Fair play you all say. Barry was in a prison being attacked by mad max villains though. So it was a tad inconvenient for him. Dose humanity's grateist hero let inevitable grizzly death dampen his spirits ? DOSE HE FUCK. Lad just solids snakes up and cuts about the prison being amazing. Arming himself with all the rouges auld gear. Barry flinging boomerangs about is a sight to see. Let me tell you that son. As you might be able to tell I quite enjoyed this issue. It was amazingly solid. Ayes the resolution to the plot was a tad shaky but ill totes forgive it. It was just so nicely written. Lots of fast paced but smart action and some genuine moments of comedy. Its just nice to see a hero who dosent crumble when his powers are taken away from them. Fuck. Barry dosent even gee a shite. He's all. It deal with it later. Lad. This might be the first comic iv read in the new 52 that has cyborg actually being happy. Hell. He's smiling most of time. Guys. He even cracks a joke. Ayes. Absolutely cracking comic. Reverse flash coming next as well. Yay !


ULTIMATE COMICS SPIDER-MAN #22

written by brian michale bendis art by sara pichelli

So massive massive spoilers guys. I guess. With the latenesses all up in here I suppose it dosent matter any more. But miles mum died. I think ? She got like shot in the armpit. I guess fatality ? The fuck is wrong with miles family. Apart from him there like all to a man, made of plastersine. I assume when his dad fines out he'll die of hart brake or some pish. Miles dose seem to be staying with big gankes family though. I do like that. That could possibly generate one hell of a vibe. Building lego all night and that. Though I spose grieving for your tragically dead mother could put a dampener on things. Oh weels. Gotta look on the bright side of things. At least miles has something to drive him on now. And you never know. His mum might get a clone at some point down the line. Worked out well for gwen. And venom was just some guy that worked for roxcon. So ? Good I guess ? At least it wasny big eddie brock going about being mental. But he dose that anyway ? I forget that last thing eddie did in the ultimate verse. Its been I while since I checked up on him. I gotta say. I liked this issue. It was a little sparse for my taste but it did have a big moment for miles. So a guess it all evens out. Fun times !


TEEN TITANS #19

written by scott lobdell art by eddy barrows

So for yet another month on the trot teen titans was once again a mixed bad. Now logicality I should jut say it was terrible. Because it really kinda was. Not offensively bad but not really worth reading either. But I dunno man. There were some parts here and there that I did at least enjoy even tough I cant bring my self to say they were actually good. So trigon just attacks earth. Like on his own. He's just cutting about new York I think on a 3 headed horse. No real build up or anything. He's literally just a big red guy going about toon. And I kind of dug that. And damn son. This trigon is hammy as hell. You'd think a big cosmic devil god wid have less banter. But no. he's making one liners and such. Really he seemed to be doing quite a bad impression of Dr doom. I can sort of here actual teen titans fans screaming right now. So red robin is still possessed or what ever pish is wrong with him. Its somewhat hard to tell the difference. Red not all that nice of a character to begin with and now that he's being almost comedicaly evil. I'm almost tempted to say its an improvement. At least he's a little bit entertaining now. Oh yeah. Like a hundred folk like actually die this issue. Just so causally. And not as you would Imagen because of trigon. Some punk as akira kid is just going about mind crushing fools. At one point a whole gaggle of army folk just drop dead. In a single panel. And the titans are loike. Oh nose ! This will make us look bad ! Fuck off with that that shite comics.

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