Lets talk Doctor Who :D Part 1

I don't know a person who hasn't heard of the magical man who is half-Time Lord, half-Human (on his mothers side(its canon guys, Wikipedia)) who can change his face and travels all of time and space in his magical blue box, the TARDIS (Time And Relevant Dimensions In Space). I myself have been a fan of Doctor Who from a very young age, like two or something, and I have forever been obsessed with it. I remember watching Tom Baker and wishing I had a REALLY big scarf as well. Ahhhh nostalgia...

What a lot of people may not know is that there was in fact a Doctor Who movie. Yeah a real movie.

It was made back in 1996 by the Americans after the show had went on hiatus in 1989 due to problems down at the BBC. Those bastards. They obviously didn't care about the show much in the old days, they even let loads of the old episodes in the 60's get wiped, presumably by giving the footage to some fucking coffee boy who left the tapes next to a big ass magnet.

The movie starred Paul McGann and Sylvester McCoy as the doctor. McCoy was the last incarnation of the Doctor before the BBC fuck up and was brought in for the regeneration (the process of the Doctor changing his appearance in order to surpass death). The movie also starred Eric Roberts (Julia's brother) as the Master, the anti-Doctor, a rival Time-Lord.

The movie starts with McGann's Doctor narrating while we look at ash planet called karo (home planet of the iconic Daleks, who sound pretty weird in this movie). The Doctor describes how the Daleks have put the Master on trial for all his evil crimes. They would never ever do this in the show, they have like no sense of justice or care about other beings they're ruthless metal-Nazis. This could be considered, if anything, a flying kick to the balls to all fans. McGann then states that the good ol' Daleks have allowed the Masters gooey remains to be taken back to Gallifrey (planet of the Time Lords) by the Doctor after they exterminate his ass. I won't even comment on how ridiculous this is.

The scene then cuts to the 7th Doctor living it up in his TARDIS which looks fully furnished and golden and awesome. Suddenly the weird urn thing thats holding the Masters remains breaks open and allows the Master to escape in a weird goo, plasma form and he goes right for the center column of the TARDIS making it malfunction and go into something called "Temporal Orbit" which basically means "emergency landing" and forcing the Doctor to pilot the TARDIS to San Francisco on the night of 30th December, 1999. Do you think the plot might have something to do with the millennium?

As the Doctor leaves the TARDIS he is gunned down by an Asian street gang. What the fuck right? This guy killed Daleks, almost wiped out the Cybermen and of course fought the ultra-gay looking Happiness Patrol and he is bested by some fucking gang in America? Thats horse shit.

member from a rival gang named Chang Lee calls the Doctor an ambulance and he's taken by away to the hospital by a paramedic known as Bruce who the Master's essence will take over and use to kill his wife, wear leather and mess about with Asian teens. That little scamp.

As the Doctor is operated on by Grace Holloway (his new, crap, American companion) he dies because she doesn't understand his vascular system (two hearts). He dies on the operating table and his body taken to the morgue, its there that he regenerates in to the young 8th Doctor (McGann).

Keep checking for Part 2, i'll try and have it up soon :)